Tag Archives: banana

R.I.P: Here Lies ‘Seductive’ Banana Eating

Oddly not the strangest story to have been seen emanating from the Middle Kingdom, especially considering the recent crackdown on the more ‘vulgar’ aspects of the great wide web. It appears China has taken steps to ban the suggestive mastication of bananas online.

Avoiding the string of going bananas puns that have accompanied the various other write ups of this somewhat whimsical affair, we will delve in the heart of the story (ish).

Closing the lid on all sorts, from homosexuality (taking down a popular online homosexual romcom) to celebrities spreading foul language, the quest for purity throughout China’s internet continues.

Nationally the interest in live streaming is growing rapidly month on month. With hundreds of, mostly 20 something females, broadcasting their daily lives to hordes of, mostly male, viewers. Allegedly its a ratio sitting somewhere around 3/4 in the favour of the less than fairer sex. As you can imagine, the prospect of watching a pretty girl seductively devouring a phallic shaped fruit has done wonders for these said streaming stars’ fan bases.

These hostesses, depending on their popularity, can rake in between RMB 10,000 to RMB 100,000 a month. Comparably that’s £1-10,000 by encouraging their viewers to purchase them virtual gifts.

Reporting an article, written by Beijing Today, the Shanghaiist quoted:

Beijing Today describes the business from one young woman’s perspective:

Ding at first was hesitant to take up camming. During her first week online, she was criticized by her agent for “not communicating enough with her online followers.” Since then, she adjusted her style and won a large following. Her peak show drew more than 600,000 viewers who were eager to watch her change into expensive clothes she bought from South Korea.“My followers are mainly young men who are very vain,” Ding said in an interview with Paper.cn. “The rest are just people who want to hit on a young and beautiful model.”

Unfortunately the government hasn’t been so keen on the idea of so many hormone driven adolescents becoming so readily corrupted by health concious streamers eager to meet their recommended daily dose of potassium. Leading to the inexorable move to ban such raunchy behaviour.

What is truly unknown and, as of yet unreported, is the potential damage this strong course of action will cause to the lucrative banana trade. It is likely that both the production and purchasing of the fruit will be severely hampered, potentially putting thousands out of work! But, then again, this is pretty unlikely.

So, whilst for now this depravity and debauchery has been put to rest, how long will it be before these girls resort of chomping on other long and curved food stuffs? Or perhaps even more extreme measures to keep those hot blooded males entertained? Soon will the ban need to extend to the general prohibiting of food and it’s consumption via webcam? Only time will tell!